I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
whose ass print is on the piano?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I'd return your shirt, but it got all wet from lying on the bathroom floor while I was in the shower with Justin's roommate...
Keep it.
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
It's like we're in an emotionally distant three-way and there's not even sex to show for it.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
