it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
I need some transition time from spring break.. can we day drink between classes this week?
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
This bitch rocks a fuckin fanny pack and still manages to lose her phone at every thirsty thursday
Weird come down, just saw a woman on the train go to grab something and realised she had terrifying hands. They literally filled me with dread. I don't think I'm ok.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize
