Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
His phone pocket dialed me while he was crapping. He was quietly singing stayin alive and possibly passing his intestines.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Seriously, why do I have a mortar round?
you are the root of all my greats nights and my worsts decisions
Sitting in my junior high parking lot high on ambien talking to a stranger I met on tinder. What is life?
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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