so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
The last two calls in my phone are dominos and 911. I'm not sure how my night went.
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
Alright, deal. Settling two drug deals before noon is what I call a productive day. I'm not even gonna go to math, I've practiced enough numbers for the day.
He also gave me two gold stars for sex. On my nipples.
You have to start asking people if they're gay before you kiss them..
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I'm handling the NHL draft worse than getting dumped this week
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
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