belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
apparently 20 random guys watched the process of me being carried on a mattress through the dorms
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
That stripper was not happy when I tried putting a dollar in her court mandated ankle bracket/tracking device
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
Randomize
