OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
Im drinkin out of a coconut! I think im gonna dip my balls in it!
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
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