My nipple is on Facebook.
I just walked by a ginger with a mullet. I repeat GINGER mullet. So help us God.
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
we've been together for three years, and i still get excited when i know i'm going to give him a blow job. it's that kind of love
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
He's hot, you can get laid, and you may get free drugs. It's the trifecta of banging a drug dealer
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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