Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
a drug dealer just gave me his business card. it had his face on it drinking a 40oz
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I make my boyfriend pay for half of my birth control. We call it his monthly rent.
im sitting in my room wearing my power rangers shirt watching a movie about a magical dragon. Ive totally forgotten what having a sex life is like.
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
U asked everyone for their hoodies so u could "safely hug the cactus"
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
In other news, I apparently ate my retainers while rolling last night.
May 25th. Drunk Laser Tag party to celebrate our bdays. May 26th. Mushrooms at Chattanooga Aquarium. Damn
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize