you kept trying to make scrambled eggs with 3 hardboiled ones.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
These welts and bruises from letting gay boys whip my thighs last night are a clear indication i should lay off the tequila.
We got out of the car in valet drinking beers we gave the valet one as a tip
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Killing two birds with one stone tonight: mastrabation meditation. Win win.
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
I'm never celebrating Galentine's Day again. It was a whorrific mess.
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
My Mormon mother just found a butt-plug in our AirBnB closet.
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