Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
You need to stop thinking about the needs of your vagina and concentrate on the greater good
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
so dehydrated I couldn't fill the pee cup to the right line for my drug test for school. I was like sorry it was my birthday yesterday
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
Randomize
