we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
Friends are holding an intervention and have no idea this gatorade is half vodka. This is gonna be the best intervention ever.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Hi Jessica this is Jessica and I am texting you and were taking lime shots and it's fantastic and I broke your elbow and I love you xo
That is the best grammar in a dirty text ever. Excellent use of the semi-colon. And yes; I am hard.
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
IDK. when she left she was wearing her bra like an eyepatch and offering to shiver the timbers of the dorm patrol.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Randomize
