well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
please take me off your list of people to text when you don't want to drink by yourself.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
We kind of crashed their funeral party. Oops.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
Randomize
