Hey, It's Lauren. i wanted to talk to you tonight. I like you, as you know because kyle told you. I was wondering if you liked me too?
Are you in the third fucking grade? Check yes or no.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I just got kidnapped by the rugby team for a scavenger hunt. I'm "the girl you had sex with last night"
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
Did you send me a snapchat of your sister triple kissing two other girls?!!! You might be the greatest friend the world ever made
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
It was a good dick. I give credit where credit is due. A good dick deserves praise.
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
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