I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
If I have to strap one on and give it to you good, you will not die revirginated. That's friendship.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
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