My low point of the night was when my roommate spit out her jello shot and i took it...
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I'm at verizon, the guy asked me why my phone is full of seeds. Deff. Not leaving my phone with you anymore.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
so there is either a lot of blood or a lot of wine in the shower....
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
This pandemic, it’s making everyone horny. I’ve got dick stashed all over town
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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