its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Every text my dad sends me is an AA mantra. Might be time to take a look at my life.
I swear to God if you start calling your dick “my pegasus” we’re not friends anymore
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
Wanna guess where my charger was last night.....in my cooler with my beer. I put it in there because I knew I would never forget my beer.
dude, he literally lasted one minute. and i paid 8 dollars for cabs.
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
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