First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
My knee is bleeding. This cheeseburger is the 3rd thing I made out with today and I think I got a job with the ducks. Catalina is poppin
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
Dude I sat in the corner of the party bobbing my head and singing danger zone
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
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