He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
"Ever since I killed her kid she be actin' shady." Actual quote overheard at Marine World just now. Oh God.
Straightened my pubes. My dick looks like John Lennon fucked Gonzo.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I can't let him end my perfect streak. HE USED TO BE FAT
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
She said our goal is to fuck in every bathroom at the reception which is at a country club. I will have the best wedding date ever! Were 4 for 4 in public.
NoShamevember. You game?
What are your thoughts toward getting nasty in a minivan?
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
