just peed in the tub, threw it on Megan.. she threw more back, I got out and threw toilet water on her.. forecast for tomorrow? pink eye.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
Yeah well my vagina has expectations too but they don't get met all the time.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
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