Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
You do realize there's a subtle difference between not remembering your outfit from april 17th of last year vs forgetting that last night you undressed in the street and were grabbing every dick you could reach, right?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
Tequila Tuesdays need to not carry on throughout the week. Having a sad Saturday
On way back. With a shopping cart. Minimal casualties.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Me and my girlfriend were watching porn together..... it got awkward cause I kept getting notifications from my family on Facebook
Either my apartment is haunted or I'm far more drunk than I thought
I woke up in nothing but my socks and my hat a cigarette in my mouth and a beer in my hand..........GREAT NEW YEARS
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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