Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
My last google search was "mavis beacon techs tping" Thank god google auto corrects bc otherwise i wouldn't know that i drunk-type 13 words a minute.
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
i think we should start 2012 by becoming clean and sober for awhile and buckle down
ppsyche im wasted where are you
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
Sorry for the milk in the bathroom. I was washing mace out of the one security guys eyes
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
she broke the sink..i repeat the sink is off the wall. send help
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
