at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I started sorting laundry at 6 am. He finally got the hint and left
Vague recollection of me ripping your shirt off at the bar... I hope I asked first, otherwise that's real rude.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
I just found two ugly toothless rednecks fucking in the woods in my backyard. The man shouted at me close the door your letting the stank out which made no sense to me cuz we where outside. Whatever. just another Monday in the Northwoods.
Randomize
