East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
did we hook up?
no, because you kept repeating "itty bitty titties" when i took off my shirt
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No I can't cure herpes. I'm an EMT, not Jesus.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
He put a canoe in the lazy river at the water and started paddling away from security
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
He fired me, I fucked his wife, we're even I think...
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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