Told my mom a bit ago she'd meet you tonight
Um...??
She's excited
I woke up in a strange girl's bed and rifled through her mail to get her name.
i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
