the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
I NEED ANOTHER LEVEL OF CAPS TO EXPRESS TO YOU THE MAGNITUDE OF MY FADDEDNESS
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I've got 3 hot dudes surrounding me. It's the Bermudick Triangle.
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
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