And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
I turn 40 next week. I deserve to celebrate the end of my 30’s with a 21 year old dick
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