Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Like do you hear me I PUKED IN MY OWN HANDS AND HE STILL SAID I WAS GORGEOUS
I have a gyno appt today. I hate it when the Army gets involved with my vagina.
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
"Fuck all you guys I'm going to be Cameltoe Spider-Man for Halloween."
Honestly, this is a first for me. I've always prided myself on my ability to pretend to get along with others.
last night I mixed vodka in with my protein shake... and you tell me my new years resolution was impossible
Randomize
