Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
What a fucking waste of an outfit
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
TRUE LIFE: my roommate is growing a bush.
better yet, TRUE LIFE: my roommates boyfriend begged her to grow a bush.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
You held your own hair and threw up into a red cup...I think they were more amazed than upset.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
His whole street is under construction. Third walk of shame this week & I'm getting a lot of sympathetic nods from the workers.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
I wore my Gollum shirt. It struck up a conversation AND got him staring at my boobs. That's a win-win.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
walked into my room this morning clutching two empty bottles of sminoff to find my roommate's ultra conservative parents staring at my posters of naked men. fuck parents weekend.
Fine I’ll come with you but you better tell that guy to wear some longer shorts because the second I see a rogue nut I’m gone
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