today is monday, i feel like we should do something illegal
I guess I tried to spit on a homeless man on the walk home...Out. Of.Hand.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
my make-up looks really good tonight. I swear it had nothing to do with me finishing all of your strawberry vodka.
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
the last thing i heard from her was "i wanna get fucked by a stranger" and i haven't seen her since
Well I thought I saw everything and then I saw Christmas themed poop bags at Petco.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
