I made out with a deaf person. Also I've been drunk 11 days in a row now.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
MIND BOGGLER: batman and jesus are the same person. Think about it.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Randomize
