i don't care who i fucked last night, until im at 43plus im not considering myself slutty
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I no longer exist. I have transformed into a puddle of sex.
My house smells like bleach. Also, I do not feel bad about all the stuff I stole from the hospital while I was there.
Just watched two people have sex in the pool. Hope you enjoy your yeast infection courtesy of the comfort inn.
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
Im about to get an ultrasound of my balls. I hate waiting. Its the worst.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
