You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
I'm in a pile of cheezits at an unfamiliar location watching dateline on tlc. Stage an intervention.
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
I was just tryna bring you beer girl. I should've known you'd be shirtless though
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
Randomize
