I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Me+graduation party+hammered drunk+polish horseshoes in the dark= black eye, crying, pissed, passed out in my dress... How was your weekend?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
i caught myself talking to a pigeon about my yeast infection.
Yeah but then he looked at me bleeding on the floor, said oh i guess you need to go to the hospital now, and left
Is it appropriate to put "Mommy and Daddys shitfaced-ness that led to Aubrey" on a birth announcement?
Well you two just had a kid in the middle of college, I dont think anyone will notice.
Thanks bro
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
My life is over, I got a mugshot while wearing a shirt that said 'milf hunter'.
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
Randomize