GOOD IDEA: Stealing the bike a couple blocks away so I don't have to walk. BAD IDEA: riding bike for the first time in years drunk as hell. I'm bleeding and my body hurts and once again I can't find my car.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
It's a bathroom floor kind of morning.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
I swear, I make more use of my creative writing major with sexting than I do with anything else
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
Randomize
