well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
i was just lookin through my fb pics and i think im with a cat in like 40% of them..: how sad is my life
So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
Life Goals: never under any circumstances, pee in an elevator again. No matter how drunk
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
Hey before you quit, let me sell drugs to your boss at least one more time
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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