the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
My dad just questioned my drinking habits... Clearly he doesn't know what kind of college education he's paying for
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
Randomize
