Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Just wanna let u know that we are almost on the pity blow job level of our friendship.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Amnesty Wednesday? I'm free to do dirty things to you and you can't laugh or judge?
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
There were a lot of gay moments in between the Strippers and coke
Randomize
