But you wanna know what the sadest part is? I had to smoke on the way back home cause my mom would be suspicious if I wasn't high after I was supposedly hanging out with you.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Why can't public transit accommodate my lifestyle of drinking til midnight on a Monday?
If I have to masturbate more than twice a week you fail as a fuck buddy. Just so you know...................you failed
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's cosmic balancing. My vagina is an instrument of karmic retribution.
It was technically 11... But I go by McDonald's time, if they aren't servin breakfast, it's the afternoon. Therefore I can drink
Well let me fuck you while I make potatoes. It's every girls dream
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize