i'd rather walk the sahara in a snuggie with no water than take a bicycle cab
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You threw up on yourself mid conversation with your mom and then told her a girl at the party puked on you.
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
What is the proper Father's Day protocol when you're sleeping with a guy who has kids?
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊
A log hopped out of the fireplace and caught the carpet on fire. Good summary of this election if you ask me.
Randomize