stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
He managed to get his pants on, so the cop just sat there facing us with his lights shining in the car. I made shadow puppets.
Um. That's my cat Laura. You put my cat in your mouth, and then you put my cat in your purse.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I'm in charge of his party but you're a paramedic, we're both needed.
Repeat. Dildo on the ceiling, confiscated potato shooter, and bottle of yegger. Repeat. Ceiling dildo and yegger.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
He passed away peacefully doing what he loved to do best. Eating a pound of vodka gummy worms and failing at sex and the city trivia.
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
Randomize
