There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
i dont even know how to be here
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I feel like my body was put in a dryer with rocks set on permanent press.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
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