oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
Minivans at bars can only lead to bad things.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
Why are there hooting douchebags outside my building? Did a sport happen again?
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
Okay so I've been talking to the mice again and they agree with me that you're a piece of shit.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
It's time you knew: I have been dating your probation officer for 7 months. Pretty certain he's THE ONE. So, thanks for being a criminal.
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize