420 ftw
dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
I woke up to realize my keys were on the front porch. Also so was I. So close yet so far
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
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