you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
If life deals in absolutes, the in betweens are the most hairy.... Fortune cookie wisdom from a stoned Megan.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
walk of shame. I'm wearing my rain jacket over my dragon costume. My tail keeps dragging in the rain.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Just called to hear your voice and talk about pizza.
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
Randomize
