yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
Not only did I hold your hair back as you puked, i french braided it. I am such a great friend.
How did your new apartment party go last night?
I'm really happy i have a bigger bathroom to puke in.
My last memory involves me naked in a mens's bathroom stall. I really hope my date was with me.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
that ring i bought was worth the 6 bucks. wore it to the bar, told some girl i was recently divorced and wasnt ready to take it off. just got laid. THRICE.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
Really stoned me is having a very serious, intent conversation with my mom about egg rolls and koolaid flavors.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
I made out with a guy dressed as the pdx airport carpet.
Portlandia didn't prepare you for that?
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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