so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
I had very briefly met him a few years ago. My friend was tired of hearing us both complain about being horny. She figured she would fuck two birds with one stone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
It's the happiest looking penis I've ever seen. It should have a top hat and a spectacle on and soft shoe across the room with a cane. He's a cheery little feller.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
We had sex on roll out bean bag chair, and then proceeded to sleep with a blanket with dolphins on it. Happy birthday to me.
Vibrator fell off the top of the dresser and hit me. This might be the most embarrassing black eye incident ever
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
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