If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I accidentally burped into my bong.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I called my dad at 3 a.m. because I thought he'd be proud that I didnt get arrested. Daddys little girl at her finest...
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
my last clear memory of the night was being offered a shot but having so much alcohol in my hands that someone literally had to pour it in my mouth for me. after that it pretty much skips to waking up face down and shirtless on my floor.
I am literally so hung over that I just opened up my emergency kit, got out a survival meal replacement bar and ate it.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Nothing is more confusing than dreaming about being chased by jets, then waking up with an erection.
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