You were running around the house with a purple crayon asking people to call you harold..
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
MY MOM IS GOING TO SMOKE WITH ME.
SHE'S GOING TO SMOKE HIGH QUALITY MARIJUANA WITH ME.
Your vase full of piss was still at his house and he still doesn't know.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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