Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
My little brother just suggested we drink the rest of the vodka because it's raining. My job is complete.
Go christen that room with your naked body.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
She gave me a collar. When I asked what this was for she replied "I'm taming your dick"
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
