i forgot what you looked like. so we left to get pizza. sorry
Those motion detector trash cans don't work fast enough to catch puke.
Well he's not a stripper, so we're already doing better than my last date.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I'm calling into work tomorrow for day drinking and kitten shopping. Totally legitimate.
Fair enough. Everyone has some guilty pleasures. Yours is yourself
The random guy I fucked from craigslist said I had the best smile. I take compliments where i can get them
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
