she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
We were doing it doggy style, and I puked on the floor and started crying, he told me it was okay his cat would eat it... and if it would make me feel better we could do anal...
And they lived happily ever after....
I hate thxgiving break now because that totally means I'm not able to have sex for a week.
he asked me if i had ever jacked off high and then referred to it as a "man-to-man question"
Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
I heard him crying and I heard him listening to porn... I'm hoping to God they weren't at the same time.
That's what you get for dating construction workers you meet in tunnels.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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