it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Its not even 10am and we are talking about what guys assholes we would finger.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No one figured out why I brought along the vibrating massager.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I'm too drunk to make ramen. What the fuck is this.
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